thanks guys)

Interesting observation Margo. I think it all comes down to doing what's comfortable. Our brain is designed to make us go towards what's comfortable and safe. I remember living in Kazakhstan, and the only reason I was able to use the English I learned in school was that my mother used to work for an oil and gas company and she would invite Americans who worked with her over to our place for dinner, so she and I could practice English. Then, of course when we finally moved to Canada, I had no choice, but to speak the language. I heard on a Podcast recently someone saying that if you want someone to do something, make it as easy as possible for them to do it. So one thing you can do is focus on making it as easy as possible for you to speak more. For example, schedule regular conversations with a native speaker once a week, write one notebook entry on italki per week, do something that scares you a little (like taking acting classes) - then speaking English won't seem so scary anymore. I think it's also important not to overwhelm yourself about it. Overcoming fear sound too big of a task. Choose one thing every time like 'today I will say one sentence to someone in English'. By the way, what you wrote was grammatically almost perfect.

Well written and if you want to speak you can. For me, I can speak to myself in my head in a foreign or I can speak to a wall or to a mirror. This will allow me to practice and see if I can construct sentences even with errors.