An obese teenager. Part 9 In other words, your child don't get trauma because you tell him the truth, he knows it himself, but because he is closed from you, and you keep and keep telling him the truth, abusing him. He doesn't ask your opinion about himself, he is not interested, he doesn't expect anything pleasing from you, but you keep attacking his psycho-protection with your criticism. Even an adult can be hurt this way, if you invade his boundaries every once in a while. When your child is opened to you, you don't need any criticism. You don't need to push him any information, he knows that he is overweight. He will tell you, willingly, that he is suffering because of his overweight, but tries pay less attention to the fact, to avoid stress. And that he would happily eat healthy food, but that junk food is the only source of positive emotions for him, that it's very important, because the rest of his life is constant stress. Now he is not telling it to you because he is afraid of your reaction, he is worried that you will seize this opportunity and start organizing his life: taking his food away, brainwashing him, like "you told yourself that you want eat less", in other words, creating additional stress. He thinks this way while you are his supervisor, and if you have become his friend, he will tell you everything himself, looking for support, not workload. "Just talking" is effective, when a person wants to talk to you. Himself. Don't force him to talk, when he is not interested and don't want it. If you say "hello" to your child, and he grumbles and tries to retreat, don't start talking about your concerns regarding his appearance and behavior. Don't be egoistic, egoism is ineffective. On the other hand, if your child wants to talk to you, himself, you're welcome. You can cheer him up, saying, that he still looks good, and that weight is not the main thing in life, and that a lot of overweight people are happy and popular. In this case you can offer him any help, starting from list of articles, regarding the theme, and to cooperative exercises and healthy diet plan. Then you can tell him that at his age it's quite easy to loose weight and that he will change so much, that all people around him will be attracted to him in immediately.