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Vanessa
Diary (9, November) Dear diary,

Today was a extremely buzy day. I went to school at 10:30 to attend the seminar. We discussed the specific policies for potental politicians to make in order to get the largest votes. I learned that what ever the policy is, there would always have winners and losers. Even though sometimes it's implicit. Fortunately I don't want to be the politicain in the future, so I don't have to make the real policy!

My friend and I went to a telecom company after school in order to tell the staff that we don't want to renew the contract after it's due. I want to sign a contract with another telecom company which can offer cheaper cell phone plan.

The whether this week is absolutely great. Everyday is a sunny day, but the temperature is around 10 to 15 degrees Celsius. Hence, it's very comfortable, not that hot and not that cold as well. I definitely go to school with good mood everyday.

Vanessa

9/11/2017

Corrections · 4

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Diary (9, November)

Dear diary,

Today was a extremely buzy day. I went to school at 10:30 to attend the seminar. We discussed the specific policies for potental politicians to make in order to get the largest votes. I learned that what ever the policy is, there would always have winners and losers. Even though sometimes it's implicit. Fortunately I don't want to be a politician in the future, so I don't have to make the real policy!

My friend and I went to a telecom company after school in order to tell the staff that we don't want to renew the contract after it's due. I want to sign a contract with another telecom company which can offer a cheaper cell phone plan.

The whether this week is absolutely great. Everyday is a sunny day, but the temperature is around 10 to 15 degrees Celsius. Hence, it's very comfortable, not that hot and not that cold as well. I definitely go to school with good mood everyday.

Vanessa

9/11/2017

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Hi Pablo! I've tried to make the sentences shorter and clearer. Please help me to correct it again! Thank you!
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Vanessa, I tried looking into it but the cellphone part was unintelligible. Try using shorter and clearer sentences in that passage and repost it. The meaning has to be clear for us to correct. Good luck!

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