A Blueberry Field

My sons and I visited a farm today.
I walked through a blueberry field while picking and eating the ripe fruit.
In the gentle early autumn sunlight, countless swallows were flitting about while eating small flies like waves of heat shimmering above a green field. (This last part seems strange: "while eating small flies like waves of heat shimmering above a green field". Did the birds eating flies look LIKE waves of heat shimmering above a green field? Or were those separate things that you saw? The grammar is not wrong, but this doesn't make sense to me. However, I am not much of a poet! haha)



The sentences below are the Japanese version of the sentences above.
ブルーベリー畑
今日は息子たちと農園に行きました。
熟れた実を摘んでは食べ、摘んでは食べしながら、私はブルーベリー畑を歩き抜けました。
柔らかな初秋の日差しを浴びながら、たくさんのツバメが、牧草地のに立ち上る陽炎のような小さな羽虫を食べながら飛び交っていました。

A Blueberry Field

My sons and I visited a farm today.
I walked through a blueberry field while picking and eating the ripe fruit.
In the gentle early autumn sunlight, countless swallows were flitting about while eating small flies like waves of heat shimmeing above a green field.

*There are no corrections to make. Great little writing piece! It sounds like it was beautiful at the farm too. I would have enjoyed being there eating blueberries as well. :)