Some opinions for the people work away from their family
In today's day and age, different cities or even different countries are more and more connected to each other, now it is very common that one works in a place far away from his/her family. Many university graduates get jobs in big cities, which are not their hometown, they are away from their family all year long and only go home for a few days every year.
For this phenomenon, what make us glad is that this shows today's society is more and more equal to all the people. One can work at any places, depends on his ability and interest, no matter where is he from. On the other hand, this is also good for the development of the society. The talents can go to the most suitable places where they could donate their advantages.
However, people work far away from their family also cause some social problems. The parents always feel lonely if all their children live far away from them, old people generally tend to stay at their hometown, so they are not going to live the city where their children work. For the people who work away from their hometown, the connection between he and his relatives will be weaken as time went by. Luckly we have internet and smart phones nowadays, which enable us to contact our family at any time, this makes the distance not so important to some extent.
From my point of view, it is hard to avoid that many people will work away from their family. people should go to the right place to work, in order to give his best contribution to the society. As the developing of the science and technology, distance should not be the barrier, one day there will be no more disadvantages in terms of distance.
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Some opinions for the people who work away from their families.
In today's day and age, different cities or even different countries are more and more connected to each other.(end sentence here) Now it is very common that one works in a place far away from his or her family. Many university graduates get jobs in big cities, which are not their hometowns. (end sentence here) They are away from their families all year long and only go home for a few days each year.With regard to this phenomenon, what make us glad is that this shows today's society is more and more equal for all people. One can work anywhere, depending on his ability and interest, no matter where is he from. On the other hand ( both of these sentences reference positive aspects of this phenomenon, so 'on the other hand is not appropriate here) This is also good for the development of the society. The talented can go to the most suitable places to which they can donate their advantages contribute their skills. (I think this might be a better way to phrase your point).
However, people working far away from their family also causes some social problems. Parents always feel lonely if all their children live far away from them; old people generally tend to stay in their hometowns, so they are not going to live in the city where their children work. For the people who work away from their hometowns, the connection between them and their relatives will be weakened as time goes by. Luckily we have internet and smart phones nowadays, which enable us to contact our families at any time (end sentence here). This makes the distance not as important to some extent.
From my point of view, it is hard to avoid that many people will work away from their families. People should go to the right places to work, in order to give their best contributions to the society. With the development of the science and technology, distance should not be the barrier (end sentence here) One day there will be no more disadvantages in terms because of distance.
8/10--just focus on definite/indefinite articles and commas
(Please grade this essay (0-10), and give your correction, thank you!)
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