My homework for Chinese lesson, i had to use the words to create a short story: 辆, 楼, 拿, 把, 伞.

Hello to everyone!

This is my homework for next Chinese (Mandarin) lesson, where i have to use 辆, 楼, 拿, 把, 伞 words to create a short story. Please help me to know if this is correct or not? Thank you in advance.

星期三下午 少更 看下雨外边。(看到外边下雨  here you may want to express that he noticed it's raining outside. so you should use看到 or 看见。A single 看  here means he is observing or staring at sth. )   

他拿他的伞就下楼然后出去。          他拿他的伞就下楼了，然后出去 （when 就 means 然后 ，there always be a 了 by the end of the sentence。）

他要去办公室。他去公共汽车站但是公共汽车不来。（没来，没到bus hasn't come yet）

他给出租车司机打电话就他看到一个他的朋友。（You're such a big fan of using 就。when you want to use 就, you can use "接着" instead of 就。）

少更 问他的朋友怎么去办公室，骑自行车还是坐公共汽车? 他的朋友回答他坐公共汽车但是他没有伞。少更 告诉他公共汽车不来。少更 说他可以送他的朋友吧。

少更告诉  说（告诉 it's a vt and must be followed by an object. you should use 说 here）  我可以回家拿你一把伞然后我们可以一起去办公室。他的朋友说好的。少更 去他的楼（apartment 公寓，住所）后去上楼。 少更 住在十五楼。少更回家和（directly delete 和 or use 接着，然后）拿一 把伞后就他 他就看一辆出租车来了。他跑步下楼然后他给这把伞他的朋友。他们坐出租车然后他们一起去办公室。                                  

   Hope you can understand what I'm trying to explain...I'm not good at ENGLISH as well ：（

Thank you for helping me in the correction!

My homework for Chinese lesson, i had to use the words to create a short story: 辆, 楼, 拿, 把, 伞.

Hello to everyone!

This is my homework for next Chinese (Mandarin) lesson, where i have to use 辆, 楼, 拿, 把, 伞 words to create a short story. Please help me to know if this is correct or not? Thank you in advance.

星期三下午 少更 看见外边下雨了。 他拿着他的伞就下了楼，他要去办公室。他去到了公共汽车站但是公共汽车不来还没来。他给出租车司机打了个电话就他看到了一个他的一个朋友。少更 问他的朋友怎么去办公室，是骑自行车还是坐公共汽车? 他的朋友回答他说坐公共汽车但是他没有伞。少更 告诉他公共汽车不来。少更 说他可以送他的朋友吧（em... he himself is waiting for the bus, how can he drive his friend? by bus??）。少更 告诉我 (too formal to use 告诉,  跟我说 is better)可以回家拿你一把伞然后我们可以一起去办公室。他的朋友说好的 (a little bit strange but I can't tell why. )。少更 去他的楼 （it means his building, should be ？ you want to say ‘进楼然后上楼‘ ’‘go into the building and go upstairs?） 然后去 上楼（strange）。 少更 住在十五楼。少更回家和拿一把伞就他 (unnecessary repeat of subject)看到（past tense. 了 and 到 is usually combined, it makes you more like a native speaker）一辆出租车来了。他跑步下楼然后他给这把伞他的朋友。（然后他把这把伞给了他的朋友) 他们坐出租车然后他们（unnecessary repeat）一起去了办公室。

Remember that 了 is a sign for past tense which is usually added after the verb. 

The second sentence implied that he had already arrived the bus station, so we use 到了 instead of goes.

不来 means the bus doesn't come, but the correct meaning should be ' it's expected that the bus should come but it has not come yet '

Wow, it's my first time trying to correct other's Chinese composition. I noticed quite a lot details but it possibly not the best way (I don't know).

Remember the past tense. (Maybe I can be your language partner? If you want to practice your verbal Chinese , I can help you)

I think my english grammar is also poor.....   you are welcomed to correct my correction.

Got to review my exams, best wishes.

My homework for Chinese lesson, i had to use the words to create a short story: 辆, 楼, 拿, 把, 伞.

Hello to everyone!

This is my homework for next Chinese (Mandarin) lesson, where i have to use 辆, 楼, 拿, 把, 伞 words to create a short story. Please help me to know if this is correct or not? Thank you in advance.

星期三下午 少更 看下雨外边。 （看外边下雨）他拿他的伞就下楼然后出去（准备u prepare going to the office but u haven‘t done it）。他要去办公室。他去公共汽车站但是公共汽车不来。他给出租车司机打电话就他看一个他的朋友。（就他和他一个朋友i think u wanna let driver know u have a friend with u ，right？im guessing）

“少更 问他的朋友怎么去办公室，骑自行车还是坐公共汽车? 他的朋友回答他坐公共汽车但是他没有伞。少更 告诉他公共汽车不来。少更 说他可以送他的朋友吧。”（这个句子可以放在你给出租车司机打电话前面u can put this sentence in front of that u call the driver）

少更 告诉我可以回家拿你一把伞然后我们可以一起去办公室。（和他朋友说我shaogeng tell his friend “i can go home get ur umbrella and we go to office together）他的朋友说好的。少更 去他的楼然后去上楼。 （楼下）少更 住在十五楼。少更回家和拿一把伞就他看一辆出租车来了。他跑步下楼然后他给这把伞“给”他的朋友。他们坐出租车然后他们一起去办公室了。

My homework for Chinese lesson, i had to use the words to create a short story: 辆, 楼, 拿, 把, 伞.

Hello to everyone!

This is my homework for next Chinese (Mandarin) lesson, where i have to use 辆, 楼, 拿, 把, 伞 words to create a short story. Please help me to know if this is correct or not? Thank you in advance.

星期三下午 少更 看下雨外边。(看到外边下雨  here you may want to express that he noticed it's raining outside. so you should use看到 or 看见。A single 看  here means he is observing or staring at sth. )   

他拿他的伞就下楼然后出去。          他拿他的伞就下楼了，然后出去 （when 就 means 然后 ，there always be a 了 by the end of the sentence。）

他要去办公室。他去公共汽车站但是公共汽车不来。（没来，没到bus hasn't come yet）

他给出租车司机打电话就他看到一个他的朋友。（You're such a big fan of using 就。when you want to use 就, you can use "接着" instead of 就。）

少更 问他的朋友怎么去办公室，骑自行车还是坐公共汽车? 他的朋友回答他坐公共汽车但是他没有伞。少更 告诉他公共汽车不来。少更 说他可以送他的朋友吧。

少更告诉  说（告诉 it's a vt and must be followed by an object. you should use 说 here）  我可以回家拿你一把伞然后我们可以一起去办公室。他的朋友说好的。少更 去他的楼（apartment 公寓，住所）后去上楼。 少更 住在十五楼。少更回家和（directly delete 和 or use 接着，然后）拿一 把伞后就他 他就看一辆出租车来了。他跑步下楼然后他给这把伞他的朋友。他们坐出租车然后他们一起去办公室。                                  

   Hope you can understand what I'm trying to explain...I'm not good at ENGLISH ：（

Thank you for helping me in the correction!