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Developmental Paragraph of Tactical Exercise by Evelyn Waugh One of the main reasons why John felt frustrated was the financial crisis he had to face. After being discharged from the Army, John found out that his flat had been requisitioned by a government office, alongside with his other belongings, such as books and pieces of furniture. In addition to this, furnished flats were beyond his income, so they had to keep on living at Elizabeth’s parents’ house in Hampstead. Another reason for his frustration was the fact that he lost his constituency. Despite the Central Office had given John his deposit, this election had cost him a great deal of money. The negative outcome of the election was due to the lack of potential Liberals in the area. The whole neighbourhood had been filled with working-class immigrants. Moreover, John did not have a fulfilling job, in fact, he didn’t have a job at all. Instead, what he would do of his day would be basically to hang around. More precisely, he would help his aunt make the beds, limp to the greengrocer and fishmonger, and at nights he would help Elizabeth do the dishes. In other words, he felt useless for not being able to get a real job. This situation was due to his health condition. All things considered, the loss of his apartment, his constituency and his lack of job helped John to feel really frustrated.

Corrections · 4

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Developmental Paragraph of Tactical Exercise by Evelyn Waugh

One of the main reasons why John felt frustrated was the financial crisis he had to face. After being discharged from the Army, John found out that his flat had been requisitioned by a government office, alongside with his other belongings, such as books and pieces of furniture. In addition to this, furnished flats were beyond his income, so they had to keep on living at Elizabeth’s parents’ house in Hampstead. Another reason for his frustration was the fact that he had lost his constituency. Despite the Central Office had having given John his deposit, this election had cost him a great deal of money. The negative outcome of the election was due to the lack of potential liberals in the area. The whole neighbourhood had been filled with working-class immigrants. Moreover, John did not have a fulfilling job, in fact, he didn’t have a job at all. Instead, what he would do with of his day would be basically to hang around.(see note) More precisely, he would help his aunt make the beds, limp(walk?) to the greengrocer(not a common term in the states: maybe grocery store, or produce market) and fishmonger(more common in States: fish market), and at nights he would help Elizabeth do the dishes. In other words, he felt useless for not being able to get a real job. This situation was due to his condition. All things considered, the loss of his apartment, his constituency, and his lack of a job helped(better:caused) John to feel really frustrated.

Note:

This sentence is a bit awkward. Maybe: Instead, all day he would basically just hang out.

Good job, keep translating!




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Developmental Paragraph

Sorry Italki somehow picked my browsing history and posted it to this entry. The correction was "Instead, what he would do with his day"

In general this passage is not written in modern English. I don't recommend to study modern English language from it.


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