Search from various English teachers...
Sara
wish someone corrected my essay (: The given bar charts are about Britain graduate and postgraduate students who did not have full-time work. These charts illustrate what they did after graduating in 2008. More explanation and details are given in the following paragraphs. In general, the most of both undergraduate and graduate students tended to continue their studies. The least number of both participated in voluntary work. From the first chart, it can be clearly seen that 29665 persons wanted to continue their studies, 17735 took a part-time work and slightly fewer than it were unemployed. Also 3500 students selected a voluntary work. From the second chart it can be resulted that 2725 persons continued their studies and a marginally fewer than this preferred part-time job. Whereas, 1625 students were unemployed and 345 selected voluntary work.

Corrections · 2

2

wish someone corrected my essay (:

The given bar charts are about Britain British graduate and postgraduate students who did not have full-time work. These charts illustrate what they did after graduating in 2008. More explanation and details are given in the following paragraphs.
In general, the most of both undergraduate and graduate students tended to continue their studies. The least number of both participated in voluntary work.
From the first chart, it can be clearly seen that 29665 persons wanted to continue their studies, 17735 took a part-time work and slightly fewer than it were unemployed. Also 3500 students selected a voluntary work. (volunteer work??) 
From the second chart it can be resulted    seen that 2725 persons continued their studies and a marginally fewer than this preferred a part-time job. Whereas1625 students were unemployed and 345 selected voluntary work.

(I have only corrected errors, not made suggestions regarding writing style or flow) 

Want to progress faster?

Join this learning community and try out free exercises!

Don’t miss out on the opportunity to learn a language from the comfort of your own home. Browse our selection of experienced language tutors and enroll in your first lesson now!

Start Learning Today