Chengdu
A song named Chengdu becomes a hit recently , the songer and the the author of the song ,Zhaolei,become a star overnight.But the Beijing‘s boy have been trying to do that for years.He writed lots of songs over the years and Chengdu was a few years ago, it only recently come into a hit.I think the song will dramatically promote the tourism development of Chengdu and Chengdu government should pay Zhaolei much of prize.haha.
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Hi there, here are my corrections. I hope this helps, let me know if you have any questions!
Chengdu
A song named Chengdu has recently become(with the word 'recently' we always use the present perfect tense and not the present simple) becomes a hit recently , the songer and the the author of the song singer-songwriter, (we always include a space after a comma or a full stop)a man called Zhaolei, has (here we use present perfect again, because it has been a recent event, and Zhaolei is still a star now)become a star overnight. (we also always use a space after a full-stop)But (we can only use 'but' at the beginning of the sentence in informal English. It looks like you are writing an informal piece, so this would be ok. If you are writing something more formal, you should use 'However', or 'Yet') the Beijing ‘s boy have has been trying to achieve this do that for years. He writed has written (present perfect here because he has written lots of songs and he may write some more songs in the future)lots of songs over the years, and he released ('released' is the word we use when a song becomes available to the public to buy and download)Chengdu was a few years ago. It has only recently come into become a hit. I think the song will dramatically promote the tourism development of tourism in Chengdu, and the Chengdu government should pay Zhaolei much of prize a lot of their profits from this, haha. (again, of course 'haha' is only used in informal writing. If you are writing really informally then it is fine)Want to progress faster?
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