First notebook entry: Introducing myself

My name is Susie and my hometown is Zhejiang provice. My hobby is travleing. I have to learn English, firstly because my major is English. Secondiy, i like communicating with forigeners to learn their culture. Thirdly, society is developing, we must know a second language to distinguish ourselves.

I made three types of corrections:
1) Use capital letters for the start of sentences and propper names (English, Zhejiang, etc.)
2) Use simple sentences. (whenever you write , ask should it be .)
3) I changed the order of some phrases.

First notebook entry: Introducing myself

my name is Susie,my hometown is zhejiang provice,my hobbie is travleing, firstly,my major is english,so i have to learn english.secondiy,i like communicae with forigener to learn their culture .thirdly,society is developing,we must know the second language to improve ourself

 

"My name is Susie. My hometown is Zhejiang Province. My hobby is to travel. First of all, my major is english, so I have to continue to learn English (improve my English). Secondly, I would like to communicate with foreigners to learn about their culture. Lastly, I believe that society is developing and we must know at least a second language to improve ourselves."

First notebook entry: Introducing myself

my name is Susie,my hometown is zhejiang provice,my hobbie is traveling, firstly,my major is english,so i have to learn english.secondiy,i like communicae with forigener to learn their culture .thirdly,society is developing,we must know the second language to improve ourself