A short diary Today was a busy day--just like the past few days. I felt a little upset because I suddenly don't know what should I do and what I am struggling for. My roommates, at the same time, just watch movies, play games or read novels. I get up at 8:00 a.m(well, I know it is not so early), when they are still wandering in their dreams, and sleep at about 0:30, when they already go bed. I feel tired. I study chemistry and don't want to miss out any chance to receive my further study. Born in a normal family, or you can say, a relative poor family, I have no choice. I must striving for scholarship, or I will not go abroad. Sometimes I am really wondering, I have struggled for such a long time, and I'm not sure where is the destination. When I look back on myself, in fact, I didn't do a lot of work. But I don't know why I always feel lonely and painful. I cannot sleep well, different dreams always run one after another. I always feel tired, I want to have a rest but at the same time, I hesitate about it. I'm afraid that once I have a rest, I would not want to go back to work at all. Someone once said, life is always filled with sufferings as well as happiness. While from my perspective, sufferings always overweigh happiness. Can all things turn out to be a happy ending--I don't know. Okay, I should not be so pessimistic like this. I should remember, only if I paid for it might I get paid.