Being Independent
Independence is a lesson that every teenager have to learn.Independence is not just being able to do things on your own, it is also thinking independentlt and thinking for yourself without harming others,taking care of yourself and the people around you, and becoming a true individual.
As we grow up, we will leave home to study or work while still in our teens. To be independent,we are supposed to do thing on our own first.It is neccessary for us to master some fundamental life skills such as cooking,washing the clothes, etc.Then,become a independent thinker tend to make it possible for us to solve some difficulties without a hand of support extended from our parents.Futher more ,we will have our own understanding and insight about the world with independent thinking. Finally,taking care of the people around ourselves is what help us to be more independent.Only when we are capable charging of our life and put ourself in the place of other people,we can be named as real independent thinker.
God helps those who help themselves. He who can become independent has the whole world with him,he who cannot walks a long way.
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Being Independent
Independence is a lesson that every teenager have to learn.Independence is not just being able to do things on your own, it is also thinking independently and thinking for yourself without harming others, taking care of yourself and the people around you, and becoming a true individual.As we grow up, we will leave home to study or work while still in our teens. To be independent,we are supposed to do thing on our own first. It is necessary for us to master some fundamental life skills such as cooking, laundry, etc.Then, becoming a independent thinker tends to make it possible for us to solve some difficulties without a (a hand OR support) extended from our parents. Futhermore, we will have our own understanding and insight about the world with independent thinking. Finally, taking care of the people around us is what helps us to be more independent. Only when we are capable being in charge of our lives and put ourselves in the place of other people, can we be named as real independent thinker.
God helps those who help themselves. He who can become independent has the whole world with him; he who cannot walks a long way.
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Some notes:
- There's nothing wrong with "washing the clothes," and if you say it, people will understand it. But a native speaker will never say, "washing the clothes." We say "laundry," or, "doing laundry."
-"Become an independent thinker tends to make it possible for us..." Okay, so all sentences have AT LEAST two parts: a subject and a verb. (Many sentences have many more parts, but in order to be a sentence, there must be a subject and a verb). The verb is the action word, and the subject is the thing that does the action. In this instance, the verb is "tends." So what is the subject? What "tends"? In this case, it's the entire concept of "becoming an independent thinker," is the subject. Because, "become" is part of the subject, not the main verb, you need to put the "ing" ending on it to make it more of a noun. Now, "becoming" is a THING that you can do.
-When using the phrase, " a hand," everyone knows what it means, and you don't need to say, "of support."
-The way we express "charge" can be weird in English. But ultimately, we usually only say "charge" followed by the word, "in." You refer to things as being IN the CHARGE of whoever controls them. So, for example: "Kelly is in charge of planning." Or, "We're in charge of Management." You could also say something like, "I am in Sarah's charge," or "The children are in the nanny's charge." But those sound formal and outdated. We don't usually use that verbiage anymore, but it's still correct.
-Another example of English being weird: "Only when we ____, can we ____." I know that makes no sense, and I don't know what grammar rules enforce this, but this is the only way we say it. When you start a sentence with "Only when (subject)..." you ALWAYS end with "can (subject)..." or, "will (subject)..."
-Last note: Remember that commas (,) go at the end of the word before them, then a space, and then the next word. Also, periods (.) go at the end of every sentence, then a space, then the first letter of the next sentence is capital.
Overall, this is amazingly well done! You use some fantastic vocabulary, and there are some small, subtle errors, but I understood everything you said! It looks like you're doing really well! Good luck! :)
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Being Independent
Independence is a lesson that every teenager has to learn.Independence is not just being able to do things on your own, it is also thinking independently and thinking for yourself without harming others, taking care of yourself and the people around you, and becoming a true individual.As we grow up, we will leave home to study or work while still in our teens. To be independent, we are supposed to do thing on our own first. It is necessary for us to master some fundamental life skills such as cooking, washing the clothes, etc.Then, becoming an independent thinker tends to make it possible for us to solve some difficulties without a hand of support extended from our parents. Furthermore , we will have our own understanding and insight about the world with independent thinking. Finally, taking care of the people around ourselves us is what helps us to be more independent. Only when we are capable charging of our life and put ourselves in the place of other people, we can be named as real independent thinkers.
God helps those who help themselves. He who can become independent has the whole world with him, he who cannot walk a long way.
Please pay more attention to the use of third person singular (s), and you need to leave a space after a full stop.
Otherwise was brilliant!
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