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Brazil flagKatherine
A little history that needs correction Once upon a time theres a girl that(or who?) wants to find her father,Rafael. He was missing at long time ,but her never really lost hope to find he one day. She lived with her mother,a woman that have serious troubles in staying in jobs. That situacion has (or had?) causes much soffer in our girl. Her name was Liza, a name give to her by her father.She works all day in a coffe shopp until late of night and did not had(or has?) time to think so much on how she will find the father.

Corrections · 5

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A little history/short story that needs correction.

Once upon a time there was a girl that(or who?) wanted to seach for her father, Rafael . .find her father,Rafael.


He was missing at for a  long time ,but her she never really lost hope to find him one day.


She lived with her mother,a woman that had a serious problem troubles in staying long in any  job.

 


That situation has (or had?) caused much suffering in for this/our girl.

> This situation had caused her much suffering .


Her name was Liza, a name given to her by her father.

She worked all day in a coffeeshop until late at night


and did not had(or has?) time to think so much on how she will find the father.

> And she had no time to think on how to find her father

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Thanks for help,Brenda and Alex : )
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Hi Hingrett my name is Brenda. I am Canadian. This is the beginning of a many classic fairy tales written in English so it was not hard to correct. For simple stories pick a tense and stay in it. You picked past tense which is perfect, just remember to carry it through. The comma in front of Rafael is not needed as there is no break in the sentence. I gave you a couple of choices for the mothers job. The other thing is, use a pronoun such as him for the father so you don't have the keep repeating that word. Hope this is helpful. Keep up the good work!
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Once upon a time there was a girl that wanted to find her father, Rafael. He was missing at long time, but her never really lost hope to find him one day.

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