The sun.
The sun's shining on me, I can feel its sun rays through my clothes, on my skin.
That feels so good, and I hardly can think back, when that was happen the last time ever.
Too long ago, that I've seen you, too much time passed, since I could feel you.
I close my eyes, I enjoy its heat, and it feels like, that I've never been aware, of my needing of you, my sun.
I feel the sun on my face, I breath the scent of naq champa through my lungs, and I feel flashed, I feel happy, and right now, that all feels so beautiful, and I really love this moment of peace.
That's my moment in a nutshell.
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Corrections · 11
0
The sun.
The sun's shining on me. I can feel its sun rays through my clothes, on my skin.That feels so good, and I can hardly can think back, remember (or recall) when that was last happened the last time ever.
[OR: I can hardly remember the last time that happened.]
Too long ago, that since I've seen you; too much time has passed [no comma] since I could feel you.
I close my eyes; I enjoy its heat, and it feels like , that as if I've never been aware [no comma] of my needing of need for you, my sun.
I feel the sun on my face; I breath the scent of naq champa [<--???] through in my lungs; and I feel flashed. [<-- wrong word, not sure what you mean] I feel happy, and right now, that all feels so beautiful. and I really love this moment of peace.
That's my moment in a nutshell.
Lovely images and feelings. :)
0
The sun.
The sun's shining on me, I can feel its sun rays through my clothes, on my skin.
That feels so good, and I can hardly can think back, to the last time when that that* was had happened. the last time ever.
Too long ago, that I'd seen you, too much time passed, since I could feel you.
I close my eyes, I enjoy its heat, and it feels like, that I've never been aware, of my needing of you, my sun.
I feel the sun on my face, I breathe the scent of nag champa through my lungs, and I feel flashed** invigorated {or charged, recharged, reinvigorated}, I feel happy, and right now, that all feels so beautiful, and I really love this moment of peace.
That's my moment in a nutshell.
*The first "that" is a preposition, the second "that" is a pronoun.
*We don't use "flash" this way. Also, be careful of usage because "flashing someone" is the act of being naked beneath a coat, going up to a person, and exposing himself.
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