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The pros and cons of social media I have made a lot of foreign friends since I started using social media such as Facebook and I could get information easily about my interests. I met my girlfriend thanks to Twitter. She lives in Japan. I can see her and talk to her by using my iPhone. We also communicate with each other on social media sites. We can help someone who tries to find missing family members or their pets. There daysk, the police use social media to solve crimes. On the other hand, There are a lot of misimformation about what we want to know. We spend too much time on it so we can't do our work properly. Someone doesn't know how to make friends in real life. Someone even uses it when they meet their friend in person. It's not good. I used to do the same thing. You can be hurt mentally online. You don't know their true personality. They said bad words easily because they don't think that you are a friend when they have different thoughts about some topics. I have experienced it many times before. Actually I have stopped using it several times before. Let's use social media wisely.

Corrections · 6

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The pros and cons of social media

I have made a lot of foreign friends since I started using social media like Facebook, and I can easily find information about things that interest me. I met my girlfriend, who lives in Japan, thanks to Twitter. I can see and talk to her on my iPhone, and we can also communicate with each other on social media sites. We can help someone who is who trying to find missing family members or their pets. Even the police use social media to solve crimes. However, there is a lot of misinformation on the internet. Some people tend to get distracted by various things, so they don't do their work properly.  It's also possible that people who spend too much time making friends over the internet won't know how to make friends in real life, and some use it even after they meet their friends in person. It's not good, and I used to do the same thing. Lastly, People tend to be harsh on the internet, which may hurt you mentally.  These people that you know nothing about can say bad things just because you have a different opinion than them. I have experienced it many times before, and have actually stopped using it several times before for this reason.  Let's use social media wisely.

The things in orange are parts that I changed pretty drastically to better explain the point I think you were trying to make.  If it sounds differently than what you intended, let me know and I can change it!

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The pros and cons of social media

I have made a lot of foreign friends since I started using social media sites such as Facebook and I could share information easily about my interests. I met my girlfriend thanks to Twitter. She lives in Japan. I can see her and talk to her by using my iPhone. We also communicate with each other on social media sites. We can also help someone who tries to find missing family members or their pets. These days, the police use social media to solve crimes. On the other hand, there is a lot of misinformation about what we want to know. We spend too much time on them so we can't do our work properly. Some people don't know how to make friends in real life. Some people even use it when they meet their friend in person. It's not good. I used to do the same thing. You can be hurt mentally online. You don't know their true personality. They say bad words easily, because they don't think that you are a friend when they have different thoughts about some topics. I have experienced it many times before. Actually, I have stopped using it several times before. Let's use social media wisely.

 

Additional suggestions:

-You can make "I met my girlfriend thanks to Twitter." and "She lives in Japan." into one sentence by saying, "I met my girlfriend, who lives in Japan, thanks to Twitter."

-The transition between 'We' meaning you and your girlfriend and 'We' meaning we as a society between sentences 5 and 6 is a little unclear. Maybe make those two seperate paragraphs to indicate seperate thoughts?

-You can be hurt mentally online is not an incorrect phrase, but sounds a little awkward. Some substitutions could be 'You can be bullied online' or 'People can be rude online'

-This might be a personal choice, but I would say social networking sites over social media sites. Both are correct though!

Hope some of that helps! :)

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I agree with you. I'll spend my time with my family and friend in real life.
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Since I've started practising English speaking skill, I have made lots of friends from different countries in the world. Sometimes, I thought I spent so much to chat with them on social networks. So I used to have feeling with a guy from Taiwan but then we've not contacted each other for a long time. All I know about him just are words , images... And I've never known about his true personality. So in my opinion, I think you should reduce communicate in social networks and spent more time to care people that living with you. Have a nice day

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