Hello Changki. ^^

While I was correcting your essay, it seems to me that you still need to focus on basic grammar and spelling. I know grammar is boring to learn but it really is important. Don't be in a hurry to learn English. Learning languages take time and effort so be patient and even if you don't like doing something but you know it is good for you, continue doing it.

~~Charlie

My history of learning English.

>> My path to learning English

I have started learning English since last year.
I was a truely beginner and i didn't know how can i start learning English.
Then i decided to get a personal english tutor.
And.. i started learning English with TOEIC.
But it was too difficult to me.
And my tutor have never told me another way or advices.

>> I started learning English last year and I was truly a beginner and I wasn't sure how I would start learning so I decided to hire a personal English tutor to get me started learning English and preparing for the TOEIC exam. However, it was too difficult for me and my tutor didn't give me any other advice to make it easier.

For 2 months, i have had class with her.
After 2 months i got a new tutor.
She teached me basic grammar.
it was so boared and no funny.
I thought it didn't get me help learn English much.
So i had with her just 1 month.

>> I had classes with her for two months then after that, I got a new tutor who taught me basic grammar but it was boring and not fun at all. I realized that it wasn't helping my learning so I just had my tutor for a month.

One day,i bought a book named Frozen.
That book included some videos that a man lectured about english.
His lecture so impressed me.
So i found his lecture on the internet, and i signed up his lecture.
It's been 6 months, and impressed me.
>> One day, I bought a book entitled "Frozen" which included some videos of a man lecturing in English. His lecture impressed me so much that I looked him up on the internet and signed up for his lecture. It has been six months and I am still impressed.
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this story will be continue.
Thanks.