IELTS Preparation writing about music. WRITING TASK 2 You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the

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Annalisa

IELTS Preparation writing about music. WRITING TASK 2 You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic: There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays? You should write at least 250 words. Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. _____________________________________________________________________________________ Music in the world is spreading. We have so many different types of music than the most of them are barely known by the majority of the population. We need music for several different reasons: sharing emotions, communicating feelings, relaxing, keeping our mind off problems, and so on. While the traditional music of a country is really interesting for historical reasons and being representative of a culture, the international music can connect people from almost each country of the world. Indeed, people coming from different cultures would be able to communicate with International music. Almost every man knows some Beatles songs such as ‘Let it be’, ‘Yesterday’, ‘Imagine’, or the Bob Dylan’s ‘Blowing in the wind’. These songs talk about hope and peace and they can bring a rassuring message to people who are suffering because of war. On the other hand, there are a lot of songs regarding violence that can conduce to bad feelings or actions such as hate and intolerance. Many adolescents perceive hate by hearing Rap music talking about the world values’ crisis. Regarding the traditional music of a country I suppose that it has mostly a good impact on People. It join people from the same country and it learn them about its culture. In conclusion I would say that both of these two types of music are equally important, but we have to avoid the risk of being negatively influenced by music. Expecially for the youngest, they should learn about which kind of lyrics should be considered and which one must be avoided. _______________________________________________________________________________________ I have to do IELTS soon, i’m open to every suggestions or any idea about what I could have written here. Also any opinion about my writing, constructs, other sentences...etc... For example: i know that there is a repetition in the last part of the essay

Corrections · 1

Music is spreading IN THE WORLD. We have so many different types of music thaT most of them are barely known by the majority of PEOPLE. We need music for several different reasons: sharing emotions, communicating feelings, relaxing, keeping our mindS off OF problems, and so on.

While the traditional music of a country is really interesting for historical reasons and IS representative of a culture, international music can connect people from almost EVERY country IN the world.

Indeed, people coming from different cultures would be able to communicate with international music. Almost every man knows some Beatles songs such as ‘Let it be’, ‘Yesterday’, ‘Imagine’, or Bob Dylan’s ‘Blowing in the wind’. These songs talk about hope and peace and they can bring a rEassuring message to people who are suffering because of war. On the other hand, there are a lot of songs regarding violence that ARE CONDUCIVE to bad feelings or actions such as hate and intolerance. Many adolescents HARBOR hate SOWN THROUGH hearing rap music talking about the world'S values crisis.

Regarding the traditional music of a country I suppose it has A mostly good impact on people. It joinS people from the same country and it TEACHES them about THEIR culture.

In conclusion I would say that both these two types of music are equally important, but we have to avoid the risk of being negatively influenced by music (IN GENERAL). THE YOUTH ESPECIALLY should learn about which kindS of lyrics should be ACCEPTED and which must be avoided.
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Your vocab is quite rich, so nice job on that! Don't capitalize general nouns, like People or Rap. My input would be: you spend a lot of time discussing international music's pluses and minuses, but instead should write more on how international music compares to traditional music. The prompt asks you to compare the two rather than explicate on both of them individually.

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