Correction

Suggestion, but not essential

The Slippers

I have to say that we just learned the simple past and i I have to write about a memory with using just the simple past.

When I was about six years old, i I went to the north with my family and my uncle's family. We went to ''mahmood abad'' Mahmudabad and I can say that it is one of those trips that i I totally remember really well! I had so much fun there with my cousins and every thing everything was going well fine. One day we went shopping and i I saw the most beautiful slippers I had ever seen in my life! Well, I was six and kids at that age just will fall in love with stupid things.! My mothor mother was like no this isn't good for you At first my mother wouldn't buy them [Or: At first my mother said they weren't suitable for me] but when my uncle bought them for my cousin and i I started crying my mother changed her mind, too. I was so happy with my lovely slippers. Later that day we went to the beach. I was runing running and playing on the sand right in front of by the sea. But suddenly i I stumbled and a big wave came to washed over me and took swept my slippers away. I started crying in immediately "c Cruel sea! gGive me back my slippers!'' but the sea was really cruel and i I didn't see them again. The worst thing was that my cousin wore his slippers all day long. It's funny, those between that day i when I lost my beloved slippers which i I really loved, and these day today nothing has changed,. [OR: It's funny, since that day when I lost my beloved slippers nothing has changed] wWe all lose our destiny to this cruel world and we think that we can control it but it's just we are wrong. There are so many things out of our control.

* I, I, I, I, I ! :D

* 'mahmood abad' => 'Mahmudabad', capitalise place names and no need for inverted commas.

*'everything' is one word

* mother

*  'my mothor was like no this isn't good for you', this is far too colloquial a way of writing this. This is how you might say this in a very informal conversation. Also, I am not sure what you mean by 'this isn't good for you'? Not suitable?

* 'by the sea' not 'in front of' it

* 'beloved slippers' is just shorter than 'the slippers which I really loved'