This is the first excerpt from one of my texts, entitled in french "Paradis d'enfer".

"I see myself there, sitting alone in the darkness of the locked room. I take refuge in my memories, and with the little strength i have left, i grab a feather and, with difficulty, a thin sheet...

My life without her... That would have been like a sunless planet. An immensity in the dark. It would have been a real nightmare. A winter night, cold, hell, no way to warm up, even slightly. I remember a wise person once said, although his name has escaped me over time, that if paradise existed, we would already be in hell. That the Earth, our beautiful planet was in hell. I do not agree. More fully. (Not entirely? / Not at all? not sure what you mean by more fully)

Yes, for many maybe, the Earth is Hell, and the fact that their life is just a succession of failures and despair, makes them believe in this false reality, but, for me, this is not the case. Since i know her, i know that heaven exists. It is not the paradise described in any bible or in a fictional world. No, it is a  real paradise, an amazing opportunity, that I live every day, from this unimaginable event. It is a world, our world, to her and to me, made of real happiness. And, because she was there, because she never left me, i can say that I do not believe in Paradise, and I even had the chance of living there. (or: I can say that I not ONLY believe in Paradise, but I even had the chance of living there ) (boon is not a word that is ofen used) 

J'espère que ça peut vous aider un tant soit peu...