Search from various English teachers...
Vietnam flagVan
The poem, Please correct it Good morning my family. Hope nice day will see you. I wrote a poem and translated, but may be my english is not good. I am glad if you would be correct it. I will give you a song to say thanks https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeCWuN0dc5w Does It happen? Two people live under the same roof Walking on the road full of happy flowers Does it happen that their hearts do not beat with same rhythm? So that they are sad at night awake with loneliness Does it happen that is two houses Rain in the sunshine, which sit wailing The same river with one bank eroded, the other built Does it happen that neither regrets Two people live under the same roof Does it happen that they let shaky Like winter returns, making spare trees trembling Like rainstorms pushing and shattering Two people live under the same roof Does it happen that there's no way of healing Does it happen that the banks have separating forever.

Corrections · 2

1

Hi

 

Beautiful poem, but it is hard to translate without knowning exactly what you mean. Poetry is so subjective.

 

anyway, here is my attempt at correcting it.

 

Could it be?

Two people live under the same roof
Walking down flower lined avenues
Could it be that their hearts do not beat the same rhythm?
So they are sad at night, awake with loneliness

Could it be that that there are two houses
Which sit whailing as it rains in the sunshine.
The same river with one bank eroded, the other built up
Could it be that neither regrets?

Two people live under the same roof
Could it be that they fall apart unnoticed.
As winter returns, making sparse trees tremble

through rainstorms pushing and shattering

Two people live under the same roof
Could it be that there's no way of healing?
Could it be that the banks have separated forever?

Want to progress faster?

Join this learning community and try out free exercises!

Don’t miss out on the opportunity to learn a language from the comfort of your own home. Browse our selection of experienced language tutors and enroll in your first lesson now!

Start Learning Today