HAPPY NEW YEAR

Slightly cold and dry wind swept across my face with disappointment and unhappiness. I said goodbye to 2014 with him in a tiny Shaxian Refection store. I don't like crowded carnival parties. Sleepy enough and hungry after 16 hours of work at a bank dealing with so called pack up working but actually no more than waiting in the last 4 hours. I just needed a quiet place to rest. It seemed to me that i was the only one unhappy to say hello to the new year. They have squeezed away lots of deposit fund to enlarge the climbing space for the next year growing, which meant we would earn very little for this year. I felt priceless about my hard work and not even a year, a month or a day could I stay here, doing some unworthy things and getting blamed and punished. What's more, I missed the trip with him to Hongkong because of my carelessness, and an extra 1000 RMB was paid for the empty booked room. Where should I start again from? I need a reason to get everything ready to begin and go on. But I am so full of despair at me and my new year.

The sentences and words in red may need to be said in a different way.