It's much better now Life is busy now, you know the darkest way is the road to light, just holding on untill you are who you want to be.People who around you are not perfect, at the same time,you get to know that you are a not good enough guy. To be a person who you want to make friend with,and he must have strong and big heart to contain all of not perfect things. So don't nitpic others' tiny thing, and give other what you can give for what others have given to or will give to. You only need to stay here ,making you are good enough to suit the guy who you are waiting for, and you won't regret what you would have done.I'm sure. You thought the meaning of life is to be happy, it's not piont to you can be lazy or life is easy, but for you have to adjust your emotion to face the real life. When others are changing , to be yourself, life can only changing your way to things but your heart.