Write something about shopping

Today I am writing wrote something about shopping:

I went to Woolworhts supermarket after I finished working . I was thinking I only needed to buy some pieces of cheese before I came in , but later I found mandarins is on sale, then I remembered something I also needed to buy  to add. At last In the end I bought two Granny Smith apples, six mandarins, two avocados, two onions, two (packs of cigarettes?) tobaccos, six mushrooms, a quarter of a pumpkin piece of pimkin, two boxes of flour, and six tins of tuna which is were only a half price., etc. It cost me $ 43, my goodness! After I was back got home I found I couldn't fit can't put them in my fridge because I bought a lot yesterday!

Wrote something about shopping

Today I wrote something about shopping:

I went to woolworths supermarket after I finished working . I was thinking that I only needed to buy some pieces of cheese before I went in , but then I found mandarin is on sale, and I also remembered something else I needed to add. In the end, I bought two Granny Smiths, six mandarins, two avocados, two onions , two packets of tobacco, six mushrooms, a quarter pumpkin, two bags of flour, and six tins of tuna, which was  half price. In total, it cost me $ 43, and i thought "my goodness!". When I got back home I found I couldn't put them in my fridge because it was already full of the food i bought yesterday!

Good work! Some tips:

Tobacco is an uncountable noun. But you can count packets of it. Usually you can group uncountables this way  e.g. bags of rice, tins of sweetcorn, pieces of information etc.

Then / When - use then if the event immediately follows the one before. Use when if you want to skip to a new time / event.

If you are making a complete list, separated by commas, the last item will be separated with an 'and' e.g. Apples, oranges, bananas and pears.

Only use etc. if the list is incomplete, and you are using the list to make an example (like in my first tip)

Today I am writing about shopping: 

I went to the supermarket after work today thinking that I only needed cheese, but I found mandarin oranges were on sale.  This reminded me of something that I needed to buy.  At last I bought; two Granny Smith apples, six mandarin oranges, two avocados, two onions, six mushrooms, a quarter piece of pimkin, flour, six tins of tuna which is only half price, etc... My goodness, It cost me $43! When I returned home I found that they would not fit refridgerator because I bought a lot of food yesterday!