A SHOCK

I heard a terrible terrible news today, a neighbor of mine got cancer. She is a kind and rational woman. She is also the deputy head of the office of my primary school, but now I do not know how many times I can see her after school. This always happens; terrible things just always happen. I know there is nothing I can do to stop tragedy from happening, so the only thing we can do is to cherish every day, and perhaps live every day as if it was your last. Do the things you like, live the lifestyle you like, spend more time with your family, treasure the friends you have, and do not let them down. Life is too short, so do not fuck it up.

Hope that helps! You had a LOT of commas in this paragraph so maybe next time in the future, you can break up the run-on sentences by using more periods. Other than that it wasn't too bad! Good job =)

A SHOCK

I heard a some terrible, terrible news today. A neighbour of mine got cancer, she is a kind, rational woman, and she is also the deputy head office of my primary school, but now I do not know how many more times I can will be able to see her after. It always happens ed, terrible things just always happened. I know there is nothing I can do to stop tragedies happening, the only thing we can do is cherish every day, perhaps and live every day as if it were your last day. Do the things you like, live the lifestyle you like, spend more time with your family, treasure the friends you have, do not let them down. Life is too short, do not fuck it up.

[That really is awful :( I like the end to this piece though, especially the final sentence! I definitely agree :) ]