Attitudes are contagious
If you will spend your time with negative people, you will realise that they will affect your emotions. They can cause you to have a pessimistic point of view on life. Some people love to whine and blame others for everything. After spending some time with them, you may feel tired, unloving, unworthy and fearful. Instead of enjoying the life, you may start to be afraid of it. What happened? You were bitten by an 'energy vampire'. Not only they suck your energy out of you, but also you turn into one :)
When others need our help, we dont want to alienate them. It is normal that we try to help them to get over their problems and make them feel better. However, at the end, we are responsible of our ownselves. We have a life, we have an energy source and we have to keep it safe and secure because it directly influences our life quality.
In the past, I was able to help some people around me. Would you believe me if i would say that during the university years, one of my friends was thinking about suicide and i helped him and now he is very happy with his life? Well, honestly i wouldnt believe that because it sounds way too cliche. At the moment, I refuse to 'cheer up' people who are not 'cooperating'. I dont understand why people expect me to do it! I may be cheerful, i may be positive. I may know some stuff about emotions. Yet, I am not a doctor and it is not my duty to cure people. I may sound selfish but i dont care. Unfortunately, for some people, it is a life standard to see the dark side of events. Well, i cant care about everyone, can i?
There are enough reasons to be happy in this life. The point is to be able to notice them.
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Corrections · 4
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Interesting topic, Dilek. :)
Most of your premises seems perfectly correct to me.
However, can I make a point ? Suppose, for example, these difficult people are our adult children, our parents, close relatives or our boss? Can we develop a technique, while living around them, in order to not get poisoned by their pessimism, whining, mania of blaming others as you say ?
From my point of view, it is not so easy, but it is possible.
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Thank you for your interest :) I agree to what Ivan said mainly but I disagree on one point because I believe we are still responsible about how these people react to our help. Imagine an extreme case that we gave money to a poor person and that person is hungry. He didnt want to save the day but he wanted something more permanent. He bought a gun and robbed a bank or maybe he grasped money in the street by killing/threatening others. Wouldnt you feel guilty?
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wow,, my thought is same as ivan thought, it's really nice topic
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Well, i think helping other people is a very importamt thing mainly for yourself. The person, who have received your help, gets just this help, and its not 100% true that he can estimate it or use it. But you get a pleasure helping another person. Thats why i think you receive more.... Of course he can be unfriendly and egoistic, but do you really care about it? If i give some money to a poor i dont care what he will do with it. He can buy new clothes or spend it on drink - its his business. I have allready helped him and feel myself a bit better, now its his turn do decide.
About optimistic and pessimistic people: better to be realistic - less illusions :)
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Nice topic, while i answered, i understood something in myself, thanks :)
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