Search from various English teachers...
China flagKarylam
I enjoy travelling "I am broke now, I will go when I have money”, "I am engaged in business, I will go when I have time”. Stop making excuses. In fact, if you want to travel, you only need a brave heart, a backpack and then go ahead. When you are walking on the way, experiences can deposit your temperament. Moreover, wider knowledge may expand your breadth of mind. I am keen on travelling, though I don’t have enough money or time. Travel is tiring, but it is worthy.It is a kind of poison which enables people to get addictived to it and I admit that I have been an addict. I am making all efforts to save more money and I am trying my best to make more spare time. I am looking forward to my next journey, although I haven't known my next destination yet.

Corrections · 4

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I enjoy travelling

"I am broke now, I will go when I have money," "I am engaged in business, I will go when I have time." Stop making excuses. In fact, if you want to travel, you only need a brave heart, a backpack, and thento 1 go ahead. When you are walking on the way, experiences can depositease your temperament. Moreover, wider knowledge gained from these experiences may expand your breadth of mind.

I am keen on travelling, though I don’t have enough money or time. Travel is tiring, but it is worthwhile. It is a kind of poison which enables people to get addictived to it and I admit that I have been an addict. I am making allevery efforts to save more money and I am trying my best to make more spare time.

I am looking forward to my next journey, although I haven't knowndecided my next destination yet.

 

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Well done! 

1 You began this list with "you only need" followed by "a brave heart" and then "a backpack." When read independently, it is "you only need a brave heart" and "you only need a backpack." Both are grammatically correct, but then "you only need then go ahead" sounds ackward following the pattern of your list. After I changed it to "and to go ahead," it finally reads as "you only need to go ahead." You see?


I changed the positioning of your quotation marks, although the method you originally used to write them is acceptable as well. Grammar rules must have changed in recent years because I was taught to write double quotes after other punctuation such as periods and commas, but it should be single quotes to reference speech (at least in British English). You can give this a read if you're interested!


http://oxforddictionaries.com/words/punctuation-in-direct-speech

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@Haru:I've heard of that before. It is as beautiful as a picture. I hope I can visit there one day.
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How about Jiuzhaigou? All the people who have been there told me it was worth visiting. The landscape there changes from season to season. I saw their photos. It's soooo beautiful!!! :)

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