Nice job! Just a few notes :)

the employment rate of college students

As is shown in the chart above,_we can see clearly ("clearly see" would sound more natural to most people, but I believe "see clearly" is still correct in this case) that the employment rate of college students is more and more low lower and lower year by year (or "year after year", or "each year")._In 1993,_the rate is was 93percent,1995 is 91percent and in 1997,it hae down to 90percent. That rate was 93% in 1993, 91% in 1995, and down to 90% in 1997.

-There are many ways you could write this sentence, but I picked one easy, straight-forward way as an example.

-Remember to a verb's past tense when writing about events that have already happened. In this case, you wrote "the rate in 1993 is . . ." when it was correct to write, "the rate in 1993 was . . ."

-Writing out "percent" (as opposed to "%") is technically correct and understandable but uncommon stylistically.

-When writing in English, remember to insert a space after periods [.], commas [,], semicolons [;], colons [:], and "closing" punctuation marks). I wrote a red underscore, "_"where this is necessary.

There are reasons here for this [trend, phenomenon, happening]. Frist,_as the job market gets is shrinking, but while jobs which society provides is are (or "remain") limited. This is a confusing sentence in English, because jobs which society provides are part of the job market. What you seem to be trying to distinguish between are, in the USA, called "private sector" and "public sector" jobs. The public sector is employed by the government and paid for with government [tax] money, while the private sector is employed by private corporations. Second,_it's easy for some students to find work., But but the fact is that some students think the salary is so low that they don't want to do the job,; they except expect to find a an easy work job with a higher salary._Third, with more students get getting into university, there's no shoreage shortage of a appropriate / suitable employee employees,_so,_graduates face fierce competition.

As far as I'm concerned, pressure is not only an obstacle but also a motivity motivator ["a motivator" or "motivation"]._Students who are in colleges must work harder than before to keep their competitiveness. Only in this way shoud should we adapt to the competitive society. I believe through their hardwork they'll get a satisfied satisfactory job.

Very nice! :)

I would argue that even if everyone works as hard as they possibly can, some people will still be without appropriate employment if the job market is not strong!