你写了：“I was busy (你还是很忙，所以最好不用“was") with my daily life these days so that I nearly had (你还没有很多时间上网，所以最好用“have") no time to go online.“

我是美国人。我平常把这样的话说：“It seems that my life is so busy these days. So busy, in fact, that I have no time at all to go online."

你写了：“So these days I went to library every night to review. And do many model test papers.“

应该改为：“So these days I have been going to the library every night to review, and do many model test papers."

你写了：“Maybe few people can really understand how it is important for me to pass the test,as Im an English major.“

应该改为：“I'm an English major, so it is vitally important that I pass this test."

你写了：“However,I still would like to learn English as a tool instead of a subject. And I learn it to use instead of test.“

应该改为：“Personally, I like to think of English as a communication tool, rather than just a college major, or an end in and of itself. My aim is to put my English to use outside the classroom, in the real world.“

你写了：“Im going to have my first French class next month.How excited I feel! I do really like languages!“

我平常把这样的话说：“And oh yeah, guess what? I'm going to have my very first French class next month! I'm so thrilled about it! I absolutely love learning new languages!"

继续加油！：）））