IELTS Academic writing task 1:need correction
In the year of 1990 and 2010, the amount of electricity created from five different sources of fuel in France, and the pie charts above capture this information.
Overall, in 1990 natural gas and coal were the highest electricity producing fuels than any other source whereas hydro power was the least producing fuel. Now, when it comes to the year 2010 nuclear power has replaced both natural gas and coal for top producing fuel, and hydro power has remained the same as bottom position.
In between 1990 and 2010 coal as a source of electricity producing fuel fell by just under the half; similarly, oil electric production declined by 22% to 13%, a 11% dip. At the same period of time another noticeable thing was the electric produced from natural gas went down by almost a quarter.
The hydro power really didn’t move as we can see a slight fall from 6% to 2% a small proportion of amount over the two decades; however, during this period another interesting thing was electric produced of nuclear power dramatically tripled from 1990 to 2010.
Search from various English teachers...
Corrections · 4
0
IELTS Academic writing task 1:need correction
In the year of 1990 and 2010, the amount of electricity created from five different sources of fuel in France [what did the amount of electricity do? increase? decrease?], and the pie charts above capture this information.Overall, in 1990 natural gas and coal were the highest electricity producing fuels, more than any other source; whereas hydro power was the least producing fuel [least productive?]. Now, when it comes to the year 2010, nuclear power has replaced both natural gas and coal for top producing fuel, and hydro power has remained in the same as bottom position.
In between 1990 and 2010, coal as a source of electricity producing fuel fell by just under the half; similarly, oil electric production declined by 22% to 13%, an 11% dip. In the same period of time another noticeable thing was the electric produced from natural gas went down by almost a quarter.
The hydro power really didn’t move as we can see a slight fall from 6% to 2%, a small proportion of amount over the two decades; however, during this period another interesting thing was electric produced of nuclear power dramatically tripled from 1990 to 2010.
0
That means still need to practice more.:/ By the way-Thank you Eric A. for your feedback.
0
You could start the sentence with "The pie charts above . . ." Also "In the years of"
In the second paragraph, you could replace "than any other source" with "of any source," and "least producing" could be "least used" . . . you could put a comma (year 2010,) and "top producing fuel" could be "most used fuel" and "and hydro power . . ." could be "while hydro power has remained unchanged in the bottom position."
In the third paragraph, "In between 1990 and 2010" could be "In the period 1990 to 2010," "the half" could be "half" and "time another" could use a comma (time, another) and "electric produced of" could be "electricity produced by"
Want to progress faster?
Join this learning community and try out free exercises!
Don’t miss out on the opportunity to learn a language from the comfort of your own home. Browse our selection of experienced language tutors and enroll in your first lesson now!
Start Learning Today
