Shot story
He had sympathy with Helen, but he had a suspicion, that she was not as easy as she wanted to seem. They met a mounth ago then Helen got into his office as an account manager. Since than they became friends. He had a great belief in her.
Everything went wrong than morning. First he found that the company's accont was frozen. Then Helen didn't came to the staff meeting at the appointed time. He had a knowlege of her punctuallity. She couldn't miss the miting without very important reason. But, why she didn't warn? He had a sudden yearing to call her. However her phone was off.
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Short story
He had sympathy with for/He was sympathetic to Helen, but he had a suspicion, that she was not as [easy]/straightforward/open as she wanted to seem. They had met a mounth ago then/when [?] Helen [got into] worked/started work in his office as an account manager. Since then they had become friends. He had a great belief in her.Everything [went]/had gone wrong that morning. First, he found that the company's account [was]/had been frozen. Then Helen didn't come to the staff meeting at the appointed time. He [had a knowledge of]/knew her punctuallity. She couldn't [miss]/have missed the meeting without a very important reason. But, why [she] didn't she tell him//hadn't she [warned him]/let him know ? He had a sudden yearning to call her. However her phone was off.
Past tenses describing reported events already in the past at the time of the narrative [ itself in the past ] should be in the past perfect tense :
'He had a great belief in her and had sympathy for her, but he had a suspicion . . [simple past]. They had met when . . . . everything had gone wrong . .' [past perfect]
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