Essay about 'most memorabletravel adventure'
One of the most memorable travel adventure was in 2010 when me and family decided to go to Indonesia for a month to enjoy vacation and explore the nature, but one of our main purpose is to visit our old babysitter.
We had a very old address book which clearly wasn't updated , so we went to her written address , we knocked on one not knowing of its her real house or not till the door opened and interpreted an Indonesian family during their dinner. It was embarrassed and sad for us because we were expecting to be welcomed by an old women who is our babysitter, but they immediately invited us into their home to share dinner and talk about nanny which turns out that the nanny has died 2 years ago and these are her grandsons.
Followd by sightseen tour through village and the entire city.
I was so overwhelmed by their friendliness, wormith and personality without expecting anything in turn.
Search from various English teachers...
Corrections · 3
1
One of the my most memorable travel experiences adventure was in 2010 when me myself and my family decided to go to Indonesia for a month to enjoy a vacation and explore the landscape nature, but one of our main reasons for going was purpose is to visit our old babysitter. We had a very old address book which clearly wasn't had not been updated. A new sentence is needed here as it will otherwise be too long So when we went to her written the address in the book, we knocked on the door one not knowing of its her real if it was really her house or not when till the door opened and revealed interpreted an Indonesian family during their dinner. It was embarrassed embarassing and sad for us because we were expecting to be welcomed by an old woman women who had been is our babysitter, but they immediately invited us into their home to share dinner and talk about their nanny. It turned which turns out that their nanny had has died 2 years ago and these were are her grandsons. Followd by sightseen They then gave us a sightseeing tour through the village and the entire city. I was so overwhelmed by their friendliness, warmth wormith and personality without expecting anything in return.
1
0
I think you mean interrupted instead of interpreted.
Also, the guy that edited your essay did a decent job, but it is a bit correction heavy!
For instance, you could easily easily say something grammatically correct like:
"Following this" or "Shortly following that" or "That was followed by" a sightseeing tour through the village and the entire city.
Also, you could have written something like "one of our main purposes was to visit our old babysitter/au pair" ... writing that is fine too.
In fact, this essay makes perfect sense to me. I'd like to see more of what you write. Don't think you always need to change what you've written into only one thing that has been suggested. Many times several choices can easily work.
Want to progress faster?
Join this learning community and try out free exercises!
Don’t miss out on the opportunity to learn a language from the comfort of your own home. Browse our selection of experienced language tutors and enroll in your first lesson now!
Start Learning Today
