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Integrated TOEFL Essay. Please, help me to check it. Thank you The text and the lecture are both about group behavior which can be divide into deindividualization and polarization terms. The author of the reading believes that these two types of group behavior influence negatively on an individual and his or her perceptions while the lecturer supports the claims made in the article by supplementing it with positive outcomes of this behavior. As a matter of fact, the author claims that in the process of deindividualization people tend to lose their self-awareness in large groups. He believes that a sense of anonymity in a group gives person a feeling of impunity, therefore, even well behaved people participate in acts of violence and ruthlessness. The lecturer bolsters this point. She agrees with the author deindividualization forces people to lose their individuality, however not only in negative way. She points out it with the illustrative examples of the effect that can have the cataclysmic event on society such as group’s kindness and the desire to help your neighbor, or exciting contest where people extremely pleased with results and express far greater joy in a group than if they would be alone. Ultimately, the author states that harmonious persons tend to arrive at more extreme decisions than individually. He notes that polarized group of people might become fed up with tiny misconduct and decide to judge and punish that villain severely. The professor on the contrary rebuts this argument. She puts forth the example of a group of employees who suffered for years from the sardonic, egoistic boss and got together in a defense position which illustrates the prosocial group behavior.

Corrections · 2

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Integrated TOEFL Essay. Please, help me to check it. Thank you

The text and the lecture are both about group behavior which can be divided into (deindividualization?)*  and polarization terms. The author(?of text or lecture?) believes that these two types of group behavior harm an individual and their perceptions while the lecturer(?) supports the claims made in the article by showing evidence of good behavior.

The author claims that in the process of deindividualization people tend to lose their self-awareness in large groups.** He believes that a sense of anonymity in a group gives a person a feeling of impunity, therefore, even well behaved people participate in acts of violence and ruthlessness. The lecturer bolsters this point. She agrees with the author that deindividualization forces people to lose their individuality, however not only in a bad way. She points to the group's kindness and desire to help that follows a cataclysm, or an exciting contest where people are extremely pleased with results and express far greater joy in a group than if they were alone.

Ultimately, the author states that harmonious persons tend to arrive at more extreme decisions than individually.? He notes that a polarized group of people might become fed up with tiny misconduct and decide to judge and punish the villain severely. The professor on the contrary rebuts this argument. She puts forth the example of a group of employees who suffered for years from the sardonic, egoistic boss and got together in a defensive position which illustrates the prosocial group behavior.

*not in my dictionary.

**supposedly, one defines 'deindividualization' as the loss of self awareness in a large group?

I was far from certain when the author, lecturer, or professor were speaking, writing or opining, or when it concerned the text or the lecture. I would have called them Mr A, Ms B and Prof C, text1, lecture1.

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Integrated TOEFL Essay. Please, help me to check it. Thank you

The text and the lecture are both about group behavior which can be divided into deindividualization and polarization [1]. The author of the reading believes that these two types of group behavior influence negatively on an individual and his or her perceptions while the lecturer supports the claims made in the article by supplementing it with positive outcomes of this behavior.

As a matter of fact, the author claims that in the process of deindividualization people tend to lose their self-awareness in large groups. He believes that the sense of anonymity in a group gives person a feeling of impunity, therefore, even well behaved people participate in acts of violence and ruthlessness. The lecturer bolsters this point. She agrees with the author that deindividualization forces people to lose their individuality, however not only in negative way. She points it out with the illustrative examples of the effect that can have the cataclysmic event on society such as: group’s kindness and the desire to help your neighbor, or exciting contest, where people would be extremely pleased with results and would express far greater joy in a group than if they were alone.

Ultimately, the author states that harmonious persons tend to arrive at more extreme decisions than individually. He notes that the polarized group of people might become fed up with tiny/little/slight misconduct and decide to judge and punish that villain severely  The professor on the contrary rebuts this argument. She puts forth the example of a group of employees who suffered from the sardonic for years, egoistic boss and got together in a defense position which illustrates the prosocial group behavior.



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1. Can be decided into terms: 


I think that it would sound better this way. 

Sorry for incorrect corrections, if they happen to emerge there. 


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