my ielts essays

Some people feel that certain workers like nurses, doctors and teachers are undervalued and should be paid more, especially when other people like film actors or company bosses are paid huge sums of money that are out of proportion to the importance of the work that they do.

-How far do you agree?
-What criteria should be used to decide how much people are paid?

While some people like doctors think their salary, despite the amount, is not in proportion to what actually they do, specifically in comparison with some famous ones (/celebrities). While others believe that no matter how hard(/difficult) the job is, the rate of income regards to some other policies. (I am not quite understanding what you mean to say here. Can you please explain it to me another way. Maybe we can figure out a concise way of saying it.) I tend to agree mostly with former idea. In my point of view (/ In my opinions/ I believe that) one must endeavor many hardships before approaching an high salary.

First and foremost, the overpayment of certain salaries in special jobs, whether or not it is fair,might cause some dissatisfacation among others. For instance when a nurse compares the importance of her job duties to soccer players, they may not can tolerate a susbtantial difference between their incomes to some famous ones. While working in a hectic(/stressful) atmosphere, they can not afford some of their (much needed) basic needs. (I added the wording "much needed" because it stressed the importance here. You may or may not use it, but I think it adds some emphasis.) Therefore, it will probably impact their motivation and make them unhappy while working. Thus, it seems this policy should be revised by policy makers.

A possible solution to provide a balance in people's income is to set new laws about monitoring the range of salaries. Apart from this, they should hold some essential consultiative session with professional sociologist to reach a new point of view about the effects of inequity in salaries .(This sentence is unclear to me. Could you please explain what you mean?) For instance , moneywise (/financially), there can be provided some free facilities by govermental budgeting to support non-lucrative jobs. Moreover, they can introduce top ones ,which are sucessful in their career,in popular to gave them fame and to value their jobs .(Can you explain here what you mean exactly? Maybe it can be expressed in another way.) Therefore this trend will lead to a sense of fulfilment among hardworking people with lower incomes and little financial stability.

Nowadays the more famous people or companies are, the more income they have. (Can you explain what you mean here?) So, the rate of salary should beconsidered as a crucial matter, among policy makers. From my point of view, the law should pay attention to all jobs indiscriminately. So, it is nessecary for government to encourage people to be satisfied with their jobs, both financially or mentally.