Search from various English teachers...
Russia flagkarkusha
What do you think of it? I've translated some text and the task was to use idioms and expressions that we study now. The text may seem a little senseless, but it's not important in this case. So. Does it sound English? It's very interesting to know what native speakers think of it. Hope you read it till the very end. Henry Ramsay wasn’t popular among the officers of the regiment. The thing is that it seemed that he wasn’t capable of anything. He objected to play cards, sang out of tune and he didn’t confide his secrets to anybody. In short, as an officer he left much to be desired. On the face of it, it seemed that Henry didn’t care that anything he would do or say gave rise to play a lot of mocking jokes on him. But in fact Henry couldn’t stand the jokes without anger. “I wish I could be like they! I wish the officers would treat me as an equal!”- Henry might say to himself when he was alone. Henry wasn’t a kind of man who could set the world on fire and he was too young to give way to despair. That was why he didn’t lose a hope of getting along with the other officers. “They can’t treat me this way all the time. At the end everything will straighten out after a while” – he would convince himself. Soon most of the officers couldn’t help noticing that Henry was quite a good chap. He wasn’t capable of lying, he never had played a trick on anybody and he was easy to deal with. That was why the officers gave up playing jokes on him. The only man who seemed to take pleasure in making life a burden to Henry was The Senior Lieutenant. It happened that he had hated Henry at first sight. Henry’s lack of experience must be getting on his nerves. Also Henry had the very weakness of looking younger than his age. And for no reason at all The Senior Lieutenant thought that Henry was an only child and didn’t doubt that he was spoilt enough. One day when The Senior Lieutenant was extremely unpleasant to Henry, the latter couldn’t stand it any longer and told him everything that he had thought of him. “Listen here! Look me in the face and listen carefully! I’ll take revenge on you. I’ll bet! I’ll bet a month’s pay that when you get your promotion I’ll play a joke on you that you’ll remember for the rest of your days”. The Senior Lieutenant could do nothing but take the bet. The news of the bet spread far and wide in the regiment and gave rise to a lot of talk.

Corrections · 3

0

Some suggested edits. Definitely quite strong over all, and even if all of the idioms and expressions weren't 100% on the money, it all made sense! Hope this helps.

Paragraph 1:
objected to playing cards
confide his secrets in anyone

Paragraph 2:
would do or say ended up with people making fun of him
But, in fact, Henry couldn't deal with the jokes without getting angry
I wish I could be like them

Paragraph 3:
wasn't the kind of man
too young to give in to despair
didn't lose hope
"In the end, everything will work out"

Paragraph 4:
"chap" sounds a bit old-fasioned, even in British English... "guy" could work, but likely too American??
never played tricks on anyone

Paragraph 5:
making life hard on Henry was the senior lieutenant, who hated him at first sight.
must have gotten on his nerves
suffered from looking younger than his age OR had the disadvantage of looking younger than his age
only child and always thought he had been horribly spoiled.

Paragraph 6:
was being extremely mean, Henry couldn't take it any more and told him just what he thought of him.
I'll get revenge on you!
I bet!
for the rest of your life

Paragraph 7:
gave rise to lots of talk OR gave rise to a great deal of talk (but this feels pretty optional to me.)

Want to progress faster?

Join this learning community and try out free exercises!

Don’t miss out on the opportunity to learn a language from the comfort of your own home. Browse our selection of experienced language tutors and enroll in your first lesson now!

Start Learning Today