You don't have to be looking to gain favor to be fawning or obsequious, you could just be someone who is very very attentive or servile by nature. Fawning and obsequious don't necessarily mean to gain favor, but ingratiate means doing something to gain favor. That said, it is my impression that someone who wants to ingratiate may do so by fawning or being obsequious. But you don't have to fawn or be obsequious in order to ingratiate. Nevertheless, some definitions of ingratiate do make it seem like it means to be fawning or obsequious. To me, someone who is fawning or obsequious to ingratiate (to gain favor/positive attention) does it in ways that are distasteful or exaggerated or not natural. You can ingratiate (gain favor) in ways that are independent or not servile. For example, I can ingratiate myself to my boss by doing a good job (not obsequious or fawning). Someone who is fawning seeks to ingratiate by saying yes to everything (obsequious) and giving excessive compliments. OBSEQUIOUS adjective - characterized by or showing servile complaisance or deference; fawning: - servilely compliant or deferential: - obedient; dutiful. INGRATIATE transitive verb : to gain favor or favorable acceptance for by deliberate effort —usually used with with FAWNING adjective : seeking or used to seek approval or favor by means of flattery