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The importance of friendship

Hi everyone, I'm starting this discussion because of something that happened to me yesterday night. I've always considered friendship as something important: it enriches our lives, it makes us smile and sometimes it lets us down. That's what happened to me nearly 4 years ago: I had a girlfriend, a beautiful one. I was just 15, so I had a typical teenager's crush, but obviously it was important to me. After a few months we broke up and there the story began. One of my dearest friend, maybe my bestfriend betrayed me and eventually he was engaged to her. Pretty soon, I realized I hadn't lost a girlfriend, I had lost a friend.

Now, I'm 19, I'm in love again with another girl, Giada. Yesterday night, I ran across him and of course he was with my ex-girlfriend. Guys, that was awkward. We still greet each other after a long talk we had 3 years ago, but we are not in touch anymore. 

I was in a very good mood but after that meeting, my night was ruined. I think my attitude towards people has radically changed. I hardly trust someone completely and I always stay frosty. I just have few friends, fewer than before, fewer than ever and my life sometimes seems to be "empty". 

Friendship is a big thing. Maybe it is as big as love. This is it, I needed to write this down. Sorry for having get you asleep, have a good day, all of you :)

Comments · 6

2

I understand your feelings about the situation, but I will say that at the age of 15, the odds of you staying with her and marrying her were not so good. Be glad you learned this lesson young. Most teenagers are selfish and don't think about a friendship versus love...or losing one for the other. It's happens in life and I believe you are a better person for speaking with them in a civil way despite how uncomfortable it was. Don't carry this burden anymore. Let it go and move on with other friendships. We take chances in life each day. Friendship is worth it.

2

Hello, maybe what I'm going to say is quite rude.. and you might say I don't understand, it never happened to me..

I think you're overreacting.. You had a very short relationship, you shouldn't try to stop love, if they've been toghether for so long they really have something... As a friend, you should understand that. 

And even if you can't forgive that... Everybody has different ways to manage in life, you shouldn't think all of us are bad people only because you think your friend was.

1

I understand your situation and feelings. But you need to know that your that friend engaging in your ex-girlfriend is not your fault, and you can learn something posive from it. For instance, your ex-girlfriend is not your dish, and fortunately, you have known this right now, not sometime latter. Even though you have exprience something bad in your youth, you will know that life is fraught with unfortunate experience, and it is better to know this and learn how deal with it early.

0

You ought to be lucky if you can change your stance to consider the problem you were suffering. As a matter of fact, to know the truth could be better than years later you then see that. In addition, "empty" your mind, clean your head is quite essential for you to move forward.

 

Good luck to you anyway.

0

You lost your friend because you think he betrayed you, but you are quite simply wrong. You were no longer dating that girl so there was no reason at all he shouldn't date her and then you ditched your friend because of it. 

 

It's your friend who was betrayed, not you. You are the one that got rid of your friend because of an EX-girlfriend who you only dated for a few months and was done with. 

 

What would have been a true friend's reaction would have been JOY for those two who found love. Your friend found something real with that girl (still together after so long) and you turned away from him instead of being happy for him and you're still doing it.

 

If you want to find people to trust, first be trustworthy. Do people have to do what YOU want them to do or not do what you don't want them to do in order to be your friend whether or not it makes sense?! First learn to be a good friend before you judge all of humanity so harshly.

 

My advice is to call up that friend and apologize to him and his girlfriend and invite them out with you and your new love, try to make up for what you did to him. Invite him back into your life. Good friends like him obviously are hard to find... just as hard as a love relationship and you are still pining over him. There is no reason to do that other than your own harbored and false judgments of him. He did nothing wrong, so there's no reason to forgive him, but even if he did... why are you not forgiving him? 

 

Be kind to him and to yourself. Call him up. 

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